Choose 1: World? or God? What do I believe?

I was going to do homework… but I have something I need to write. It’s been eating me up inside and I feel like I need to share it.

As a writer of fantasy and as a Christian I face different questions every day. There are people that challenge my faith and my chosen method of telling stories. Apparently there are people who really do think that fantasy is wrong for a Christian to write, but that’s a topic for another time…

I made a choice today, that’s the real topic.

I was supposed to go see the new Deadpool movie this afternoon. I was going with three of my friends, but last night I had a bit of a crisis. This has happened before due to anxiety and I’ve had to cancel, but this time it was for different reasons, deeper reasons. As everyone knows the movie is rated R for language, violence, and graphic nudity. For someone who’s watched every episode so far in the Game of Thrones series this shouldn’t be too bad. In fact, one of my friends later told me that Game of Thrones is worse on these fronts. But lately I’ve been trying something… I’m a Christian, have been for a very long time, but my walk with God has been one of struggle and disobedience. Now, over the past year or so really, I’ve been trying to walk closer to God. I don’t always read my Bible every day and I certainly don’t always listen, but I’m trying.

Over the summer it started to bother me, things like Game of Thrones and the content within. It didn’t feel right. there was this nagging feeling that I shouldn’t be watching that kind of content. Not the magic and the dragons and all of that stuff… that doesn’t seem too bad, it’s just different storytelling devices to get a message across. But there were unnecessary things, like the sexual situations, that would not have taken away from the story if the scenes had not been shown.

I’m okay with violence, I know that it isn’t real, nobody is actually getting hurt, it’s fake. I’m even fine with all of the swearing. I hear worse from people just passing on the street. Do I think it’s okay to swear? No… no I do not, and I try really hard not to do it. But most of the time, the swearing won’t detract from the story if it is removed. It can help to set up a scene, but it doesn’t have to be used everywhere… My biggest problem is the sexual content. I believe that God wants us to be modest. I believe that in a way staring at another person, naked/having sex, is a form of adultery. It is being disloyal to whomever my future husband might be. And no matter what I am a Christian, therefore I am a part of the bride of Christ, therefore it is being unfaithful to Christ.

But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. – Jesus, Matt. 5:28-29

When do I gouge out my eyes? In this verse it is specifically referencing men, and I’m not saying the I’m lusting after Ryan Reynolds or anyone else in that movie who was shown naked or in a sexual situation, but I do believe that this passage is talking about anyone male or female, and that looking at a man lustfully is the same as looking at a woman lustfully, it is unfaithful. No, I do not think it’s alright to go around maiming myself or others because of a perceived indiscretion. I think that in this passage Christ was trying to call attention to the severity of sin, and just how serious it is to commit a sin.

Sin leads to only one place, it leads to Hell. It really is better to prevent yourself from sin in some way than it is to go to Hell for that sin. For me, it wasn’t gouging out my eyes, it was choosing not to go see the movie. If I watched it it does not mean that I will automatically go out and start swearing and having sex and committing random acts of violence, but I do believe that it desensitizes one to the actual act of committing a sin. There are so many places in society that we see things that in the Bible are sins, but they have become so common that we actually trick ourselves into believing that they are acceptable, when in truth they are only acceptable to the world, but not to God.

Friday night I felt a nagging feeling that I should not go see that movie. I doubted that God wanted me to see it. I had the choice to obey Him and not go to the movie. Or disobey Him and go, thereby risking the relationship that I work to have with Him. I chose to obey, I did not go.

But whoever has doubts is condemned if they eat, because their eating is not from faith; and everything that does not come from faith is sin. – Romans 14:23

For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. – Romans 6:23

I doubted the appropriateness of the movie for a Christian… so I did not go. If I had gone ahead and seen the movie, even with these doubts, it would have been a sin. Frankly Im not willing to risk my soul for that.

By no means am I advocating a boycott of the movie. My Dad and Sister have seen it, I think. If you really want to see it go ahead. That is your choice. Maybe there is no doubt in your mind. Maybe you aren’t a Christian so there is no reason for you to have any doubts about the movie…

But it isn’t just this movie. It’s shows like Game of Thrones. It’s that kind of content in general. I’m a writer, so don’t get me wrong, I love a good plot line and I love to see, feel, and read these stories. It’s a part of who I am. But as a Christian I believe that there are certain things that I should stay away from.

I am uncomfortable when people start talking about sex around me, whether it be porn, or their own personal sex life. I don’t want to hear it. I believe that there are some topics, such as rape, that do need to be discussed and thereby dealt with. But just giving me a detailed description of your boyfriend’s penis… not necessary. Talking to me about the latest porno you watched… not cool.

Teasing me because I’m uncomfortable with talking about sex? Also not alright. I get it, that is how the world views things and it is acceptable, but that doesn’t mean that I have to take part. As a Christian I don’t feel like it is appropriate. I am called to live in the world as a witness for God, but not to be a part of the world and the way it works.

As a result, not only did I decide not to go see Deadpool, I made the decision to abstain from that kind of content in general. I do not believe that it is right.

I want to see God, but I can’t see Him if I am disobeying His word. I’m the kind of person, most people are, that if I see something it will later play back in my mind. For me, it seems to be when I’m in Church or praying, trying to have time with God… and instead of hearing or seeing Him, I see that instead. My grandpa made a good point when I talked with him about this… why would I want to watch it, “pick that up” and take it with me to Church, to my devotional time… just to my dreams at night… why? If it’s not something you’re willing to carry, don’t pick it up… because you might not be able to put it down. I made a choice, I chose to listen and obey. I chose not to compromise my morals… not today, not ever again. I chose my side, and defined my beliefs.

If I disobey (and there will inevitably be mistakes as I’m only human) I can always ask forgiveness… but that isn’t the point of God’s forgiveness. Some of my friends understand this choice, some of them do not. People who aren’t Christians may laugh at this… but those of you who know, who have read the Bible… ask yourself this question…

Just because the world says it’s okay, does that mean that God thinks it’s okay?

I know what the answer is for me… I’m not saying you should do what I say… read your Bible, check what God says… this is my interpretation, and it is the interpretation of others I know as well. If you aren’t a Christian, feel free to ignore this, heck I’m surprised you read this far… If it makes you wonder… do your research, maybe check out what Im talking about. I made the right choice for me… I hope maybe it can help someone else make the right choice for them, whatever that choice is…

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